“There is no chance, 

no destiny, 

no fate, 

that can hinder or control the firm resolve of a determined soul.”

– Ella Wheeler Wilcox

The human spirit is so much stronger than any fate.

Any bad luck.

Any bad circumstance.

The human spirit is made to love unconditionally and passionately.

To go forth with resilience.

To climb with superhuman capacity.

And to overcome.

Overcome fate.

Overcome fear.

And anything that stands in the way towards survival and evolution.

We forget what we are made of.


Every day we wake up forgetting who we are.

We forget for years.

We forget for lifetimes.

That we are made to adapt and thrive.

But yet we get lost and very afraid.

Afraid to remember who we are.

Most people in the world are simply getting by, paying the bills, getting through the day without meaning, without laughter without anything.

Without anything.

Yesterday in the streets of Chicago I saw a homeless man with no legs, he had the most loving face.

A face that just stared out into the world.

So I went and stood in front of him, and he looked me straight in the eyes with meaning, with knowing.

And I looked straight back at him.

He was more happy with the eye contact than with the money I gave him.

He did not even look to see how much money I put into his bucket.

He just looked at me and I knew this man had history, he was smart, he knew the world.

But he sat there alone, without legs and without his spirit.

Until my spirit met his.

Until someone brought him to the present moment and saw him.


He overcame.

He remembered.

I put my arm on his shoulder and smiled at him.

Then he smiled back. Physical contact. Acknowledgement. Validation.

No words were exchanged. There was no need for that.

We have forgotten that we are all in this together.

We didn’t just forget our own abilities but that we are here with everyone else.

I am here with you, you are here with me.

Remembering who we are.

I am going to ask for a favor today.

Just like I am reminding you that you were born with a determined and strong spirit who can do the impossible I want you to remind

someone in your life of that too.

Let this letter serve as a connection point between us.

Just like I looked at the homeless man straight in the eye do this for someone today.


Remind them that they are so brilliant.

Convince them of their capacity to find meaning in a meaningless day.

Will you please do this with me today?

We need each other.

With life,


PS. I will be speaking in Portland on Feb 5th, and Vancouver on the 11th.

“I recommend keeping a copy of this book as part of the household library. Since everyone has a life experience of some type of loss/change/grief event. I recommend giving this book as a gift for those deeply effected by loss/change/grief.
This book has been a Godsend to me. I feel such relief now understanding the biology of grief; the emotion, neuroscience and experiences that are normal grief related phenomenon. Just knowing these facts has spiraled me out of the vortex that bound my joyful spirit after the death of my mother.”

Amazon review for Second Firsts