I always believed that I was someone who tells it like it is.
I have been called a tough cookie more times than I can count.
I am the person people come to if they want to know the truth.
So, when I discovered that I have been bending over backwards in my life I was very surprised.
I was shocked to be honest with you. Completely and utterly shocked.
But when I looked further in I saw it everywhere.
I was allowing so much c**p in my life.
I am a little angry with myself. How didn’t I see this?
What was I thinking?
But you know why I missed this truth about myself?
It was hiding in the details. In the words.
In the moments when I said to someone “don’t worry about it”, and “it’s ok you are late” or “you don’t have to pay me for this.”
I may not have been bending over backwards but I was bending.
Every single day. And after bending for so long, I ended up backwards.
But when did this start?
You see, I like to find the exact moment and then observe the journey to here.
I looked, and looked and finally found it.
When I entered this new life, making my dreams come true, I didn’t really believe that I belonged here. The author. The expert. The woman who knows. And I started over delivering.
Over delivering also means bending over backwards.
I over delivered in my classes, with my clients, with thousands of people.
Giving, and giving and giving, making sure they thought I was worthy of this new place I had found my new life in. Well enough of that. It is time to claim my spot in this place, here.
And it is time for you to do the very same thing.
But in order to make this change you have to see yourself as enough without having to bend over backwards.
You don’t have to give what you don’t have.
I am so so done with this. It is not going to be easy at first. We have spoiled people.
They now expect the moon and the stars. And the whole universe from us.
But we have to start from somewhere.
And today, right now is the perfect moment.
Hear the words you use. See who abuses your time.
Who in your life just takes but never gives? Start with those.
And make it simple. If someone is late, tell them to make it on time next time.
If someone expects you to always pick up after them stop picking up.
Take yourself back. Take your time back. Your money back. Your life back.
You are enough without the bending.
After all sitting up straight is our evolutionary gift.
And if this letter has a bit of a tone, I am not apologizing for it. I am going through this straightening up myself right now. And I need this tone to keep me going. I hope you borrow it and use it for your reclaiming.
With true love,
PS. Please let your family and friends know this is where they can sign up for this letter too.