The day I realized that I had to rely on my own thoughts and believe them as true, I was freed. That is when I started to believe that my ideas are not that bad and the world around me did not know better than I did.

That is when my true journey of grief started to come to life. It was the journey towards my freedom. Freedom from pain. Freedom from guilt. Freedom for what others thought I am to do with my life after the terrible loss I experienced.

My journey did a U turn and that is when the fresh air got into my lungs and I breathed for the very first time. My identity shifted into a new place of growth. For the first time I knew that my devastating grief made me different.

I am sharing this with you, as I know that you are able to scan the world with laser focus, and filter it through this spectacular wisdom you have gained along this path of loss.

Listen up my dear survivors.

You can rely on your own wisdom. It is very possible that because of all that you have gone through in this life, you have earned more wisdom than the people around you.

Start asking your self what is the next step instead of waiting for the answers to appear through others who have no clue what is like to have walked in your shoes. To have felt the agony. To have lost so much. To have frozen in time. To have wanted something that they could never have again. To have wanted to forget. To have wanted to
not wake up.

Start growing your self reliance by looking within and trusting that what is there will get you where you need to go.

I did, and it got me to all of you, to a new family, to a new beginning, to a new Christina. To a new voice that started speaking to me when I allowed my self to listen to my own thoughts.

So listen in. Trust and go forth.



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